Friday, October 12, 2007

Kelvin O'Neil Is A Lying Sack Of Shit

Little Kelvin O'Neil is no different than his master, Alderman NoMooreFoieGras. Kelvin sent me an email claiming that he has nothing to do with the disappearance of Don Gordon. He had the audacity to claim that we neighborhood bloggers have been the victims of some merry prankster. What a lying sack of shit. Only someone affiliated with Joe NoMooreFoieGras would want to play a vicious joke on us bloggers. Therefore, Kelvin O'Neil, as an associate of Joey, is responsible. Don't think we're going to let you worm of the hook. You haven't heard the last of this from us.

Me and my crotch rocket are off to Colorado this weekend for an important crotchocross competition. I'll be back next week with lots of YouTube videos of the race that you can all oh and ah over.

3 comments:

Knightridge Overlook said...

It's not much of a joke if you just copy him verbatim.

G.N.O.M.E. said...

GLOBAL NEXUS OF MAYHEM EVERYWHERE

The G.N.O.M.E.s know where Don is... We are the reason why Tom Banannis sees a conspiracy under every rock. We are out to push every decent human being out of Rogers Park. Only the scum will survive.

Westgard can dig all he wants but he will never find where we've buried Don.

Braig can look all he wants in the sewer drains. Don isn't there either.

Don tried to leave secret messages disquised as piles of shit. We were nearly caught by Shrill Morton. He had picked up the trail of spoor and was only minutes behind us until we lost him in the cigarette haze of the Red Line Tap. Despite Shrill's lousy review of the Red Line on Yelp* we know he occasionlly hangs out there looking for people to admire his hair.

Tom Banannis said...

I'm so glad that those folks on Morse don't have my internet blog address. I don't have to worry Braig, next time they'll be looking for you.