It's Official -- Tomblogger Eastgard Is Insane

If you had any doubts as to the sanity of my rival blogger and archenemy, Tomblogger Eastgard, look at this crazy rant he emailed me.

Braig,

I didn't know it was possible but you have just hit a new low with your blogging. I see that you have a new rant on your blog about crime in Rogers Park and part of it is a quote taken from another blog stating that Rogers Park is a very dangerous neighborhood and that anyone who doesn't live here is advised to not come here [see my other blog to find out what this idiot is talking about]. You fail to provide your readers with a link to the blog from which the quote comes. When a reader specifically asks you for the source you pompously state that it is not your job to promote other blogs.

For your sake I guess it is a good thing that you did not provide your reader with the requested link as the reader would have seen that you have taken the quote out of context. The quote comes from a parody blog which is making fun of you and your penchant for hysteria. If you read the entire blog entry you get a very different sense of the author's opinion of you and of Rogers Park. You fancy yourself to be a journalist but your tactics are nothing but the worst sort of tabloid journalism. I don't know how you can show your face in public knowing how many people in the neighborhood are laughing at your buffoonery.

The author of this parody blog clearly doesn't take their work too seriously. She or he seems to be doing nothing more than indulging in a practice exercise in creative writing with the ample material you provide. There is no doubt in my mind that the author of the parody blog is delighted that you continue to maintain your silly blog as each day you provide her or him with more fodder for mockery. You think you are an heroic crusader but this person regards you as nothing more than a drunken idiot. The author clearly thinks that Rogers Park is not the hell hole that you portray it as being but a pretty nice place to call home.

I, however, am not the author of this parody blog and I think you are pretty appalling. In light of the tactics you have shown I don't see how anyone can give you any credibility. Your loyal readers -- Phughy, Sandy Duncan, Shrill Morton, Stinkjar, Proartillary, Laura Loserzader, Tomblogger Womannis, Jostle_Lynn -- they all blindly follow your lead and by doing so make themselves look even more stupid than you. What a pathetic joke you all are. I for one would be happy to see the last of you.

Sincerely,

Tomblogger Eastgard
Attorney at Law

Can you believe this crazy idiot? This just goes to show you what Joe NoMooreFoieGras's minions are like. Well Tommyblogger, I got news for you. While you're sitting in your miserable storefront office hoping to actually get a single client before the year is out and writing that blog of yours that no one reads, I am going to switch on my police scanner, jot down a few crime calls that I will turn into sensationalist blog entries that will be read by my billions of loyal readers all over the world. Then, with my work done for the day I am heading down to the Oasis. You ask yourself, who is more of a man. Me or you?