This is addressed to all of you who have attacked me and my family on this blog and my other blog and on your own blogs. You're all cowards.
You see, it's all right for me, but not you, to make personal attacks on other people and on their families. I'm a Rogers Park blogger and that is what I do. Remember back in the fall of 2006 when Don Gordon was first running for alderman? This was before I decided I liked him. I attacked him. I attacked his nasty skanky daughter. This is perfectly acceptable. He made himself into a public figure so he and his family are fair game. I and my family are not.
It is all right for me to quote from other blogs without giving them a link when I can take quotes out of context and when I need to hide the fact that the blog I am quoting from is a parody blog which mocks me mercilessly. I don't know who's writing the parody blog in question so it is impossible for me to post a link because it just is. If anyone used my blog in a similar way they would be a dishonest coward. I am not because I cannot be a coward as I am a heroic crotchocross racer.
My loyal toady Jostle_Lynn is also not a fair target. She is my number one fan. Right now she is in my condo, wearing her old high school cheerleader outfit, cheering me on as I blog. Attacking her is the same as attacking me so it is wrong.
I have been called the neighborhood drunk. I am not a drunk. I spend the majority of each day at the Oasis because it is my duty to tell the patrons what a vile slum Rogers Park is and what a corrupt, incompetent hack Joe NoMooreFoieGras is. When I have a few drinks there it is because the patrons need to feel I am one of them if my message is to sink in. I am making a big sacrifice by spending the day at the Oasis.
It is ridiculous that I have to waste blog time saying this when Rogers Park, the worst slum in the entire universe, is in the grip of a slumlords and corrupt Christmas hating politicians. For those of you who have devoted your life to obsessing about me and my blog, why don't you get a life and start obsessing about Joe NoMooreFoieGras and Rogers Park.
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14 comments:
Damn, you stole my next parodic blog post. You also forgot a section:
"Oh, and just because my father is the founder of Gay Chicago Magazine, and furthermore not only produced, directed, and starred in gay porn films, so literally anyone who wants to can watch him cornhole and be cornholed, and furthermore he founded one of the country's largest and best known gay porn review and awards programs, none of that makes it appropriate to say that he's a homo. Because we're sensitive, and that language is painful to our tender ears."
I'm sure Craig's desperate and plaintive cry for help will lead to the appropriate outpouring of pity.
Hey Tommy Boy, glad to see you so enjoyed my fathers gay porn movies. Even storefront closet-case lawyers needs to get their rocks off. Did you watch them with Loki?
And Tom, If you need to be kept update on the hottest vids, check this site out. If you order your movies from the site, I get a cut.
http://www.gayvideodad.com/
Gosh, Craig, if nothing about those statements bothered you, your response would be different. Your response would be more along the lines of, "Dad was a great guy, and what he did was totally okay. Therefore, if Tom thinks it's funny or weird, that shows a limitation that Tom has. It says nothing about Dad." But instead, you implicitly vindicate the implications by leaping to your dad's "defense," pushing accusations at me about watching gay porn, and, interestingly enough, implying that I would abuse my son by exposing him to adult sexuality at an inappropriately young age.
Dang, boy, could you possibly make your feelings about your relationship with your father any more clear?
You know, Craig, many of us feel suffering about things that happened in the past. But not everyone reacts in the way you do. Something to think about.
G.N.O.M.E. Global Nexis of Mayhem Everywhere
Braig, you pitiful scum. Someone like the Gnomes leave a beautiful Christmas song on your blog and then you take it and post it on the parody blog.
We will not leave you any more tunes if this is done again. We will post them on the Eastgard blog if this happens again.
Meanwhile, here's a new one.
Verse 1:
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
If you were just half wide-awake, you’d burn non-Christians at the stake.
Oh Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Christmas.
Verse 2:
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
Baby Jesus rides in Santa’s sleigh, fighting against cultural decay.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Christmas.
Verse 3:
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
You love the lesbians and gays, but won’t support this holy day.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Christmas.
Verse 4:
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Holiday.
You won’t fund soldiers in Iraq, but make war on Christmas with your act.
Oh Jan Schakowsky, Oh Jan Schakowsky, why do you hate our Christmas.
Can you believe what an ass Tom is?
pooie
Like Granny always said, "Consider the source."
Tom, too bad your life is so interesting that you don't have time to follow Braig around taking pictures of his dog crapping and posting it on the internet.
Some people lead purposeful lives. Others seem to have no purpose at all. That's why they focus on such crap-o-la.
http://p197.ezboard.com/Can-anyone-out-there-help/fbuenaparkneighborsfrm2.showMessage?topicID=2963.topic
Very funny. Kids and Gay bars.
Ok.
(o)(-)
Ooooh, thanks Braig, it's like the holidays already, there's snow on the ground and more pictures of Eastgard on the blogs. He really does have the most endearing shabby look about him doesn't he?
Hey, how come you didn't get any pictures of the poop landmines? I thought that was your favorite, and a whole parkway full, c'mon, you're holding out on us.
Toto was mildly amused that Braig would even suggest holding his snow/skate boarding championship party in a Gay Bar. Can you say fresh teenage boys?
Well, that's a new one. I've thought for quite a while that the gay community would do better to get Craig out of the figurehead position he currently holds - just by the jerk behavior that he settles into so naturally, he undermines a lot of PR work.
But add to that a suggestion that he should hold a youth-centered sporting event in a gay bar? Hell, just saying that he wants to bring kids into a bar is pretty bad. Then you add the opportunity it creates for people who hate gays to exploit it as part of the "promoting the gay lifestyle" narrative.
Craig just doesn't know how to sidestep fights that aren't worth fighting.
And after all the fuss about me deleting comments, he deletes his entry over at Buena Park Neighbors. Who's the hypocrite now?
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